I was talking to a good friend the other day and she was telling me about a situation she had where a couple of Russian exchange students approached her as she sat by the beach. They had a decent conversation, talking about America, her life, what they were doing here. The Gospel itself never came up. Jesus was mentioned as she talked about who she was. The fact that He is the only way to heaven was not brought up though.
We joked a little that I couldn't believe a Bible college student didn't bring up the Gospel in that situation. We were on the same page, however, when thinking about evangelism as part of discipleship, as part of a relationship, pointing the other person closer to the Cross of Christ in that relational context. The question was raised then, should it be different when speaking to someone that you know you'll never see again?
What about the times when a relationship really can't be built? Do we go back to our "confrontational" methods of evangelism or do we mention Jesus in passing and pray that they run into someone they can build a relationship with that will point them to the Cross of Christ? Or is it something else entirely?
I have some answers but I thought this would be a good subject to raise to both anyone who would like to comment or any of the other "bloggers" connected The Couch who would want to post their responses. Kind of an interaction collaboration. :)
So, here's the question more clearly: When we don't have time to build a relationship with someone, do we need to feel compelled to always share the Gospel with those who do not know Christ?
Friday, June 24, 2011
Friday, June 3, 2011
Living with Technology
So this blog post has roots from awhile ago but just never happened. Today is one of those days where I could be doing something else but that something else isn't working out so I have the free time/motivation to finally write this one out.
I love technology. I really do. And not just in the creepy Kip Dynamite sort of way. I remember thinking when I was younger "Unless they invent flying cars, I'm pretty sure there isn't anything left to invent." I mean when you've got AOL 3.0, what else do you need? Over the past few years we've had so many advances it's crazy. And I don't even own an iPhone! And the iPod Shuffle I do own is MIA! (That didn't have anything to do with the rest of this, just an empty attempt to gain pity.)
As awesome as the era of the smart phone, Twitter, Facebook, blogs, hotel internet, HDTV, DVR, ESPN is... it comes with some downsides that I think we overlook too often. That's the point of this. I'm not here to bag on technology (see the part where I said I love it) but rather to point out some of the lurking dangers that can exist if we let it. So without further ado, here are a few areas that could be a blog post on their own but who really wants to read that?
A text without a context....
Somewhere along the line, texting became the main mode of communication for a lot of people. More than phone calls, more than emails, even more than Facebook. It's really convenient... you don't have to talk to people longer the size of your text. When you're done talking to them you can just stop texting back and they'll assume you're busy with something else or that you got into a wreck. (Don't text and drive.)
In the midst of all of this, we've lost the idea of context. You know, the things that a real conversation has. Body language, tone of voice, sentences that last longer than 160 characters at a time...
The obvious problem with this is that the receiver has to fill in the blanks. Was the comment just made sincere or sarcastic? From someone like me that enjoys a fair amount of sarcasm, it's hard to tell sometimes. Even if you are able to communicate something as heartfelt, you really don't control the message. The receiver is able to interpret it anyway they want. This is why I often make jokes and if they aren't immediately responded to positively I start to send additional texts to try and soften any blow that may have come across. (So what, call me insecure!)
I think we would be wise to consider how we use mediums of communication that don't provide this context to say things that are important to us. If it really is that important to us, it's probably worth a real conversation or at least a phone call.
The danger of speaking in 140 characters....
The original impetus for writing this was a Tweet a few months ago by Rick Warren. He tweeted something that sounded a lot like he had been blinded by a toxic poison. My thoughts immediately went to Two-Face from Batman. Rick is a nice guy but when you add toxic poison there's just no guarantee that someone isn't going to go crazy and try and try and take over a city. It turned out that he had been gardening and got some plant stuff in his eyes. Serious enough for the hospital but not quite Two-Face serious.
The truth is that I've made similar mistakes myself. In this era of Twittering, I've said things that I didn't think through the wording of before I tweeted it. Twitter is great... but I've seen more instances of miscommunication over it than anywhere else. Matt Hasselbeck making other NFL players angry because he made a joke about the collective bargaining agreement. John Piper making people upset over his "Farewell Rob Bell" tweet. Similar to the same idea of speaking without context, we weren't designed to say important things as soon as they pop into our heads and only in 140 characters.
Expectations of the immediate response...
I fall into this so often. I text someone. I write on their Facebook wall. I tweet them. And wait... an.. entire... 5.... minutes. Why wouldn't they reply earlier than this? What have they been doing that it took them 5 minutes to write "lolz"?
Somehow we've forgotten that people used to send letters....
And they wouldn't hear back in weeks....
Maybe months!
The real danger of the expectation of the immediate response is that it takes us out of the now. It takes us out of the relationships and the conversations and the work that we're dealing with right now. In regards to work, people probably use this as an escape. With regards to conversations in real life... we need to realize that it's not wrong to prioritize conversations. The ones that we're having with people right in front of us > the one on our phone. Sure, that might make the person (even me) angry when you don't immediately go see the cat video they found on Youtube... but that's ok. We're harming our relationships by watering them down to serve everyone at the same time.
Thinking that you should matter...
Now, before you read this incorrectly and get angry, hear me out. I'm not saying the danger is thinking that you matter. You do matter. To those close to you. To your family. To God. Maybe me. (I can't guarantee anything) The danger of the era we live in is that we broadcast everything we think and do and then expect the world to respond.
It's not a problem to enjoy those things. The problem exists when you start to expect it. When you start to think that you deserve the response. When the fact that you made French Toast should move your 2000 Facebook friends to tears. It really wasn't that long ago that they only people that would know that you made French Toast would be anyone you happened to tell when you saw them that day.
I'm getting off track talking about French Toast, the bottom line is that it's not really a problem to talk about the events going on in your life...
It's when a response from others to those statuses and those tweets becomes an expectation rather than a blessing.
I love technology. I really do. And not just in the creepy Kip Dynamite sort of way. I remember thinking when I was younger "Unless they invent flying cars, I'm pretty sure there isn't anything left to invent." I mean when you've got AOL 3.0, what else do you need? Over the past few years we've had so many advances it's crazy. And I don't even own an iPhone! And the iPod Shuffle I do own is MIA! (That didn't have anything to do with the rest of this, just an empty attempt to gain pity.)
As awesome as the era of the smart phone, Twitter, Facebook, blogs, hotel internet, HDTV, DVR, ESPN is... it comes with some downsides that I think we overlook too often. That's the point of this. I'm not here to bag on technology (see the part where I said I love it) but rather to point out some of the lurking dangers that can exist if we let it. So without further ado, here are a few areas that could be a blog post on their own but who really wants to read that?
A text without a context....
Somewhere along the line, texting became the main mode of communication for a lot of people. More than phone calls, more than emails, even more than Facebook. It's really convenient... you don't have to talk to people longer the size of your text. When you're done talking to them you can just stop texting back and they'll assume you're busy with something else or that you got into a wreck. (Don't text and drive.)
In the midst of all of this, we've lost the idea of context. You know, the things that a real conversation has. Body language, tone of voice, sentences that last longer than 160 characters at a time...
The obvious problem with this is that the receiver has to fill in the blanks. Was the comment just made sincere or sarcastic? From someone like me that enjoys a fair amount of sarcasm, it's hard to tell sometimes. Even if you are able to communicate something as heartfelt, you really don't control the message. The receiver is able to interpret it anyway they want. This is why I often make jokes and if they aren't immediately responded to positively I start to send additional texts to try and soften any blow that may have come across. (So what, call me insecure!)
I think we would be wise to consider how we use mediums of communication that don't provide this context to say things that are important to us. If it really is that important to us, it's probably worth a real conversation or at least a phone call.
The danger of speaking in 140 characters....
The original impetus for writing this was a Tweet a few months ago by Rick Warren. He tweeted something that sounded a lot like he had been blinded by a toxic poison. My thoughts immediately went to Two-Face from Batman. Rick is a nice guy but when you add toxic poison there's just no guarantee that someone isn't going to go crazy and try and try and take over a city. It turned out that he had been gardening and got some plant stuff in his eyes. Serious enough for the hospital but not quite Two-Face serious.
The truth is that I've made similar mistakes myself. In this era of Twittering, I've said things that I didn't think through the wording of before I tweeted it. Twitter is great... but I've seen more instances of miscommunication over it than anywhere else. Matt Hasselbeck making other NFL players angry because he made a joke about the collective bargaining agreement. John Piper making people upset over his "Farewell Rob Bell" tweet. Similar to the same idea of speaking without context, we weren't designed to say important things as soon as they pop into our heads and only in 140 characters.
Expectations of the immediate response...
I fall into this so often. I text someone. I write on their Facebook wall. I tweet them. And wait... an.. entire... 5.... minutes. Why wouldn't they reply earlier than this? What have they been doing that it took them 5 minutes to write "lolz"?
Somehow we've forgotten that people used to send letters....
And they wouldn't hear back in weeks....
Maybe months!
The real danger of the expectation of the immediate response is that it takes us out of the now. It takes us out of the relationships and the conversations and the work that we're dealing with right now. In regards to work, people probably use this as an escape. With regards to conversations in real life... we need to realize that it's not wrong to prioritize conversations. The ones that we're having with people right in front of us > the one on our phone. Sure, that might make the person (even me) angry when you don't immediately go see the cat video they found on Youtube... but that's ok. We're harming our relationships by watering them down to serve everyone at the same time.
Thinking that you should matter...
Now, before you read this incorrectly and get angry, hear me out. I'm not saying the danger is thinking that you matter. You do matter. To those close to you. To your family. To God. Maybe me. (I can't guarantee anything) The danger of the era we live in is that we broadcast everything we think and do and then expect the world to respond.
It's not a problem to enjoy those things. The problem exists when you start to expect it. When you start to think that you deserve the response. When the fact that you made French Toast should move your 2000 Facebook friends to tears. It really wasn't that long ago that they only people that would know that you made French Toast would be anyone you happened to tell when you saw them that day.
I'm getting off track talking about French Toast, the bottom line is that it's not really a problem to talk about the events going on in your life...
It's when a response from others to those statuses and those tweets becomes an expectation rather than a blessing.
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